I turned on my TV the other day and the first thing I heard was "BREAKING NEWS..." so naturally I'm thinking "uh oh, this could be a long day." Turns out the Breaking News was actually an update to Chelsea Clinton's wedding. I knew then that it was going to be a long day, but for a different reason.
Seriously, what kind of world do we live where an ex-president's daughter's marriage is considered breaking news? Is there nothing more serious or pressing going on in the world right now? Thank you once again, CBS Early Show, for opening my eyes to just how stupid and ridiculous this world can be. I guess it coulda been worse... it coulda been another update on Lindsay Lohan's pathetic, miserable life.
I will say this: that "Breaking News" got me thinking about how overblown and outrageous weddings have become. Sure Chelsea Clinton's wedding was expensive, but she's also loaded and sort of a public figure, so her parents are going to go all-out (especially if it gives Hillary some media attention... 2012 is right around the corner after all). But did you know that the average wedding nowadays costs around $25,000??? $25,000!
Now I have a few close friends who are getting married, and I want to make sure if they read this that they understand I'm in no way dogging their weddings. I also know that what I'm about to say will probably hurt my chances with the ladies... but it needs to be said. Flat-out, $25,000 is way too much to spend on one night of fun, even if it's followed by a week of awesomeness on the honeymoon. So much of that money goes into the dress (which is pretty, sure, but is forgotten after the ceremony), the wedding cake (which hardly anyone ever eats anyway), and the booze (the only respectable thing I can think of wasting money on)... it's out of hand. I can think of about a million different things I would rather drop 25-grand on than a one-night party with a bunch of people I hardly know.
And while we're on the subject, let's talk engagement rings. I can't tell you how many women I've known who have been upset because their boyfriends were taking too long to buy them an engagement ring... but do you women understand that those are thousands and thousands of dollars? I'm trying to save money to buy a house... there's no way I can afford to waste half my year's salary to buy a little piece of metal with a rock in it so that you can giggle and show it off to your friends! The way most marriages are going these days, I'd bet the majority of dudes are still paying for those rings well after the divorce is finalized. And in a lot of cases, those engagement rings come off once the wedding is over and are NEVER WORN AGAIN! That's a shame, it's a waste of money, and it's absolutely ridiculous.
I have an idea. How about we all sit down and get back to what marriage is really about. Instead of seeing how much money we can piss away on flowers and tuxedos and tablecloths, let's instead think about how many years we're going to be together and decide if that's really something we want to commit to. Let's stop counting the dollars going down the drain, and start counting our blessings that we've actually met someone who we're willing to share the rest of our lives with. Let's drop the fancy clothes and cakes and instead focus on family and friends and their support of our love for each other. Let's try an experiment, and put a spending cap on the American wedding. Under this cap, you don't get to wear a fancy dress (you can dress up, but none of this $8,000 bullshit). You get a bakery cake instead of some overpriced garbage. And you get to invite family and a limited number of close friends. Oh and there's no registry for gifts. Okay, so now that we've got all that in place, let's just see how many weddings there are. That will really separate those who are truly in love from those who are so caught up in the surface-level ideas of an engagement/wedding, and I'm going to go out on a limb right now and say that under this experiment, the number of weddings (and divorces) will drop considerably. Just a thought...
Who Are You Really Helping?
Recently, a man was freed from prison after spending almost 30 years behind bars for a crime he didn't commit. He was released and will be compensated nicely for the time he spent locked up (even though that hardly makes up for the hell he's been through). I can't imagine how awful that must have been, how terrible it would be to wake up every morning in jail, knowing that you're an innocent man. I say this because I want you to know that I am in no way trying to diminish what this man went through... but what DOES anger me is that the so-called "activists" jumped all over this guy's story, and in my opinion exploited his situation beyond belief.
This guy was an African American, but what I'm talking about goes way beyond African American Activists, and way beyond the local level. All over this country, for all races, there are activists who make their money preaching great ideas like "equality" and "freedom for all," when in reality all they are doing is perpetuating the exact opposite.
Look at it like this: America was founded on the idea that the harder you work, the better your life will be. It was also founded on everyone being equal, which unfortunately didn't last. Slavery was a terrible thing, as were the way the Irish and other Europeans were treated in early America, as well as the Asians during World War 2, the list goes on. However, these tragic parts of our country's history have now been reduced to ammunition which is used by these activists, to victimize those very same populations. Now instead of telling people "the harder you work, the better your life will be," these people are being told that they deserve to be treated better, and that they are owed something. I say that's trash.
Slavery was awful. The tenements in New York were awful. World War 2 and it's internment camps were awful. But those were years, decades go. I didn't have anything to do with that, and neither did any of my living relatives. Chances are, neither did yours. It's time to put down that sword and accept that, while there are still plenty of injustices in America (on all sides, including against white people), for the most part we are living in a more equal and level country than we ever have before.
Martin Luther King had a dream, and I believe that dream is being trampled on by the same "activists" who claim to be protecting it. A perfect example: Mr. King dreamed of a world where people were not judged by the color of their skin... and yet here we are with Affirmative Action, which basically gives a person a job based on the color of his or her skin. Who started that? The Activists. Now you tell me, because I can't really understand how that is protecting Mr. King's idea? Anyone? No?
My favorite part of this is that when someone from one of these populations (like Bill Cosby) decides that it's time for us to stop hiding behind past transgressions, that there's no excuse for us being lazy and not wanting to work, that it's time for us all to get off our asses and make things happen for ourselves instead of depending on others to carry our weight... that person is then shunned, kicked out of the community! And in the meantime, these "activists" are profiting off of creating more division and inequality, stirring a pot that doesn't need to be stirred, and creating a rift that shouldn't (and probably wouldn't) be there if they hadn't started it in the first place.
So here's my message to all of you: why not hit the reset button? Why not give life a fresh start and try hard like everyone else? Sure you may have some transgressions against you (like our guy who spent 30 years in jail for no reason), and sure you have a right to be angry about those and to be compensated for those... but let's stop falling back on the same old dividing factors that none of us had anything to do with, and instead look forward to actually living in a world where we can get a job based on qualifications, where we can walk down the street and not feel nervous when a group of people from another race pass by, and where we all respect ourselves and each other enough to work for ourselves, to take care of ourselves, and stop waiting for someone else to pick up the torch we lit and clean up our mistakes. In other words, a world where people take responsibility for themselves and their actions, and where they hold themselves accountable for improving not only their own lives, but the lives of their children and the people around them. How's that for a dream?
Where Is The Line Anyway?
I've noticed a lot of conversation lately about the proposal to build a mosque very close to the site of Ground Zero... you know, where the 9/11 attacks took place? Yeah, there. Understandably, it's got a lot of people upset. There are those who think this is an insult to the people who died on 9/11. and there are others who say that not all Muslims are bad, and that we should look beyond our petty differences at the big picture here. I can see both sides, though I definitely don't think a mosque should be built anywhere near the site of Ground Zero.
Really, I don't think ANYTHING should be built anywhere near that site. Build a memorial there, a testament to the innocent people who died, and call it a day. Keep ALL business (and yes, I believe organized religion is a business) away from it, because it is sacred ground.
However, if you ARE going to allow buildings near that location, at least be tasteful about what you're going to put up. Building a mosque near ground zero is like building a giant statue of some Japanese guy overlooking the water at Pearl Harbor. Most Muslims are normal people who just want to live their lives in peace... most Japanese are not war-mongering crazy people who crash their planes into ships or buildings. But that doesn't change the fact that you're crossing the line by building either of these buildings, and spitting in the face of the people who died in both cases.
I've heard the argument that foreign countries would never let us build a church near one of their sacred sites, and this to me is a very interesting argument. It's also one that I think could shed some light on why some of these Muslims/Japanese/Neo Nazis/whoever hate Americans so much. Building a church is one thing, but building a McDonald's, or a shopping mall, is quite another. Especially in the case of the Muslims, these are societies who have existed for thousands and thousands of years... they have their traditions and norms and they're perfectly happy. But then here comes the United States with all of it's freedom and democracy, and we cram it right down their throats. There those people were, doing just fine without us, but then we show up to "help" and the next thing yo know Baghdad looks like Atlanta. That's great for us, but it's completely taking a dump on them. And so if we're not going to allow the construction of a mosque near Ground Zero, maybe we should halt construction of the Chili's on the Tigres River.
The lesson here is that on both sides of the culture, we need to leave well enough alone. We need to stop trying to push our lifestyles on each other, no matter what we believe. We need to stop trying to westernize the middle east, and they need to be a little more sensitive to what happened here on 9/11 and maybe build the mosque around the corner or down the street some. Leaving Each Other Alone is step one to world peace, because I believe when we don't have a real reason to kill each other, we probably won't.
Smokin' Aces
So there's this dude named Buddy Israel, a card trick guy in Vegas who gets tied up in the Mob. He gets big, but then he gets in over his head, and now the Mob wants him dead. The mob puts a bounty on his head (or heart, actually). The problem here is that the FBI wants this guy alive. In fact, they want him testifying so they can bring the mob down. So this Israel guy is holed up in a penthouse at the top of a hotel in Lake Tahoe, and all kinds of contract killers are after him. Meanwhile, the FBI is in a race to get there first and protect him until he can give them the information they want. In other words, it's a recipe for disaster.
And unfortunately, that's kinda what this movie is. Oh sure, it sounds great on paper. Get a bunch of hitmen (the usual suspects: a group of crazy brothers, a couple angry femenists, some ex-cops who think they know everything, and a couple loners who are masters of death) and have them basically assault a hotel, while the FBI tries to figure out what's going on and gets thrown under the bus in the process. The movie even starts out great, very "Snatch"-esque, introducing all of the main characters and their specialties. But after the beginning, this movie quickly falls apart.
I think the biggest problem here is the organization of the entire story. You've got a great setup with this dude on an island in the hotel, but a lot of the killing stuff happens before we even get there. You've got the good-hearted FBI agents who don't just learn a lesson, they get their asses kicked. And you've got a bunch of conscientious murderers who feel sorry for what they're doing. The movie quickly goes from awesome, to confusing, to way to deep for its own good, to just plain disgusting. Throw in a "twist" that any moron can see from a mile away (the only way they could've made it more obvious would be to stop the movie and explain it to you), unconvincing actors, and a bunch of people who you just can't bring yourself to feel sorry for... and you've got a 2-hour crapfest that you'll never, ever be able to get back.
Plus Jeremy Piven is a douchebag.
So in case you haven't noticed (TWIST!), I'm giving this movie a huge thumbs down. It's got a cool title, sure, but you will be disappointed. Don't believe me? Go ahead and rent it, all you Piven fans out there, see just how quickly someone can take a great conceptual idea, and in two hours crap all over it.
Have a nice day.
